Feeling anxious anyone?
My No 1 Anxiety Strategy
Anxious anyone? Uncertainty abounds right now, and it can feel like the anxiety it entails is unavoidable.
It’s tempting to distract the discomfort away. To go somewhere else in your head, to disconnect from the body.
So I want to invite you to experiment with a different strategy when discomfort hits.
Why not try:
To sit with it.
To get comfortable with the discomfort.
It’s the perfect way to make peace with the rollercoaster of 2025. Comfortably uncomfortable.
Why does it work?
The brain has shortcuts aka heuristics which allow us to handle the complexity of the world. They play a BIG role in how we deal with discomfort.
Take public speaking.
The first short cut for most people is “Being stared at = threat." It worked for your ancestors. And it can be very helpful on a dark street. It’s a lightning response of discomfort or anxiety. “Something’s wrong, I’m the target.”
This shortcut keeps you small and stuck and it’s a good idea to shift to a different relationship with the discomfort.
Step One: You can update it with a bit of practice to “It’s ok to be stared at, I can be looked at and stay grounded and open and it’s fine.”
Step Two: Then you can take this comfort with discomfort out into other situations “This makes me uncomfortable, that’s interesting.”
The mindset that helps when you meet a limiting shortcut in your brain and you feel stuck or uncomfortable) is one you might recognise.
The strategy that works best is to be curious about the discomfort, or “curiouser and curiouser” as Alice in Wonderland would say.
If you want a simple way to explore your shortcuts around public speaking there’s a great drama school lesson called “Being Seen” which you can learn from.
It’s very simple. They make you sit or stand silently in front of an audience or group.
Do nothing.
Just *be*
Without reacting, fidgeting or performing.
You can do this with your audiences even if you aren’t at drama school.
First find some safe audiences - speak at work, join a public speaking class, improv, acting etc
Then get curious.
When faced with an audience notice the discomfort - what are you feeling? Thinking? What are your brain’s shortcuts around it?
Ooof it’s uncomfortable at first. But when you meet this discomfort head on, it becomes a very useful exposure therapy.
Your instinct is to rush - speech, breath, movement.
Notice that short cut then.
Stop, ground, relax into it.
Open your gaze, relax and drop your shoulders.
Open your chest, open up your spine, relax your jaw, release your breath, quieten your mind.
Get curious and you turn the discomfort into a signal to engage with, rather than avoid. That changes everything.
“Curiouser and Curiouser” can help you with all sorts of 2025 challenges!
Have a great weekend getting curious 😻
Caroline x